Doctor, vocation or occupation

Some people think,"Medicine is part of their lives." So Doctor is their vocation, a kind of job. They are easiely to be detached from patient's problem. On the other hand, some people think,"Medicine is their lives." So Doctor is their occupation. ----paraphrased from Health Practice Lecture
How many roles do I play? I'm a Christian, daughter, medical studen, cousin, friend, spiritual mate, class(lecture, course) mate. Some of these roles cannot be seperated. However, if there is a conflict between these roles, what should I do? hm...As a doctor, I should be honest and show empathy at the same time. However, if I cannot have recognition with my patients, I'm just "showing" empathy. Can I still be myself when I'm a doctor? I don't like to put on mask and be a doctor based on all kinds of expectation. Yes, I have to meet people's needs. But do I have to put it this way?

The lecturer also asked us the reason we chose to be a doctor, or at least be a medical student.
This is a really good question for me. Hard to answer though. Why do I want to be a doctor?
I have a dream, just like the lecuturer said, to go to the third world countries and change sth! The only difference is that I want to go with missionary teams. Medical services have a lot of demand in these places, as well as gospel. So this is the reason that I have droped occupational therapy and science and did my best to get into medicine. I don't think I've wasted 2 years doing other degree because that made me understand I have a passion to medicine. yeah I know that my "ideal" dream sounds naive or maybe it's not practical. I also admit that there are some other reasons, eg social rank, money(now is only the money to raise my family cos at least I have to pay back to my parents, they have sacrificed a lot to support my dream.). However, without this passion, I may just be an OT or scientists.